INT. LIVING ROOM - night
MOLLY and BIERDE are working overtime together. The view from the apartment wide window is mostly tree branches from the second floor, and beyond that, on the horizon, a row of houses stacked atop each other like a row of chairs in a theater house gradually line up behind each other on an incline. As MOLLY loses herself in the view, she lights a joint.
MOLLYhis is much more relaxing.
BIERDE looks up to meet her comment while he surfs the Internet on his laptop for news he can use from the associated press site.
BIERDECan you turn the fan on? Please. The landlords don't like it when they smell pot. MOLLYWell DEIRDRE is the same way. Why do you think…
MOLLY crosses the room to scrutinize the buttons of a portable cooling unit.
MOLLY (CONT'D)How does this work — uh, I feel chill.
BIERDE surreptitiously rolls his eyes at MOLLY.
BIERDEThe on button is second from the right. Can I get a hit of that?
MOLLY takes a giant drag and gleefully prances towards BIERDE to hand him the joint. His hand, swollen from a ganglion cysts on his wrist, reaches for the joint.
BIERDE (CONT'D)When I started at RS, I was so stressed. DEIRDRE's cool, though. I'm sure her landlord doesn't like people smoking around the property either. MOLLYWhy were you stressed? BIERDEMy typing speed. I mean, I was fast on a typewriter but when computers replaced my old manual typewriter, I couldn't figure out how to customize the qwerty board to match the keyboard on my typewriter. MOLLYShould've GOOGLED it.
BIERDE pulls open a file cabinet to search for a file containing web instructions on how to tackle reprograming computer keyboards. At the top of the page, BIERDE's name appears as a header, next to the page number. He hands it to her.
Bierde hands back the joint and leans back on the sofa to enjoy the rush. molly takes the document and the joint back to the window.
BIERDEMake sure the neighbors don't see you smoking.
MOLLY frowns but abides. On the window sill, a fly spins in circles upside-down as it attempts lift off
MOLLYChuang Tzu in dream became a butterfly, And the butterfly became Chuang Tzu at waking.
Molly pronounces 'waking' with a "y" at the end: wakes.
BIERDEHuh? MOLLYWhich was the real — the butterfly or the man?
EXT. STREET - NIGHT
A Volkswagen pulls out of the driveway. The driver glances at the window and waives a hand at MOLLY from inside unaware that her tinted windows shadows the gesture.
INT. LIVING ROOM - NIGHT
MOLLY separates herself from the dying fly on the windowsill in disgust as she continues watching the car, sneaking hits from the joint as discreetly as possible.
MOLLYIt's a poem. Your neighbor is leaving. BIERDESo. MOLLYSo… it's kind of like the butterfly effect — I dunno if you've seen that movie — but it leans more toward parallel universes; or rather alternate realities. BIERDEWow. That's kind of right up there with time travel and how flies can dodge my finger flicking at it, which by the way I GOOGLED as found out that the average speed of a flicking finger is 30 miles per hour. MOLLYSo you never smoked with DEIRDRE? BIERDENope. I'm sure she smokes, but she doesn't do that with co-workers. MOLLYWhy? We're co-workers BIERDEDude, you're asking the wrong person.
MOLLY lip synchs the last few bars of the song in the background "… to slave for me eternally"
MOLLYCan we change the music?
BIERDE meets MOLLY's eye nodding approvingly.
MOLLY (CONT'D)Hey, have you ever noticed that Space Mountain is like being a fly and flying around in the dark? BIERDEYou mean DISNEYLAND space mountain?
MOLLY nods, stoned look on her face, and appears to be trying to conjure up what she's forgotten she wanted to say. She hands BIERDE the half-smoked roach, now snuffed out from the lack of activity trying to keep it lit by hitting it.
BIERDE (CONT'D)Maybe. But I think it's weird how the long line to get into that ride slopes sideways.
MOLLY is now lost.
BIERDE (CONT'D)Yeah, you know.
BIERDE struggles to keep his train of thought
BIERDE (CONT'D)There's a portion of the line when it seems like you're finally entering the building, but really, it's just the veranda. And, near the ledge, it looks like it's parallel to the ground, but it feels like you're leaning on one side of your leg more than the other. I just remember it triggers my sciatica. MOLLYh, I didn't know you have sciatica. Good reason to be smoking this stuff.
MOLLY offers BIERDE a light.
BIERDEHave you ever seen SMILEY FACE? MOLLYNo. What's that? BIERDEA movie. Anna Faris is in it. MOLLYWhat's it about. BIERDEIt's a stoner movie, like Cheech and Chong. MOLLYHarold and Kumar? BIERDEYeah! It's funny. Did you know you can't get that on on-demand yet. And a new copy of the DVD runs about eighty bucks. MOLLYWhoa. Why's it so expensive? It can't be that good. BIERDEDunno. MOLLYDo you know what ever happened to that lady that started working here a couple months ago? BIERDEWho? ELLE?
INT. CAR - NIGHT
A small sports car, driven by ELLE, travels alongside the L.A. River.
INT. LIVING ROOM - NIGHT
MOLLYWhy do you spell your name like that? BIERDELike how? MOLLYWell, if my name was pronounced BIRDY, I'd probably spell it like that to dispel confusion. BIERDEMy name doesn't have to be pronounced BIRDY. Originally, I spelled my name B-I-E-R. Like German beer. And it was pronounced like beer too. MOLLYWhy'd you change it? BIERDEThe computer age doesn't always honor the bits and pieces of a full name. It's FIRST and LAST name; and sometimes suffixes. MOLLYPeople give you smack for having a first name like beer? BIERDEYeh. You know it's just a variation of Pierre, right? And Pierre is the French version of Peter? MOLLYYeah. BIERDEBecause my last name has a preposition, it isn't part of the name. I added it to the end of my first name so the letter "d" wouldn't be capitalized. MOLLYOh, like de GUZMAN, or de Jesus. I get it. That way the system doesn't capitalize the letter D and combine your last name with Jesus which would in turn result in the spelling of Jesus with a small letter J.
BIERDE is mesmerize how accurate MOLLY can be.
BIERDEI told you this story before, haven't I? MOLLYYeah, but we weren't high. I tend to remember stuff better when I'm high. BIERDEIs that a school thing?
MOLLYIf you changed your computer name to BIERDE, the command prompt would resemble DEIRDRE's name on her puter whenever she used command prompt. Or Terminal.