Bier de Stone (blanketsin.com) wrote,
Bier de Stone
blanketsin.com

It is a sign to get off my lazy ass and take a walk

I cannot hear myself think. I'm sitting in my room trying to read a book and the neighbors next door have an infant. I wouldn't say an infant neither, because he's old enough to repeat his words with clarity at a volume that a small urchin might easily produce with all his effort, short of a wailing tantrum. For the past fifteen minutes, just after the getto bird made it's rounds to interrupt what little headway I was making in I.F. Stone's biography, "Da! Da! Da!!" Pause. "Da. Da! Da!!!" Nonstop.

Then, I'm thinking, why not write a poem. I haven't done that for some time now. Lemmesee, where should I start?

What a living hell
it is to dwell
in a place on earth
from the moment of birth

Yes, helpless at one
dependent on love
then when one's old, her memory faltered
of the time when your heart was made fodder.

Reflections of then
useless and dim
now that you see that she's gone
on to prosper beyond

With a boon to watch over
now grown a bit older
and little else fathered by you
Yes, life is cruel

… but then I decided, since my poems only bring me down, that I should explore some of the ways the protagonist in a screenplay I want to write decides that it is better to end his life than to get himself arrested and put away for life. What kind of crime does one have to do to be put away? After all, our protagonist isn't a spring chicken anymore. He only has, probably, twenty or thirty years. Who knows? middle age is funny that way, and the idea that he might get caught red handed breaking the law, which would result in a good twenty to thirty year term, his life would be over by the time he got out. So, he becomes suicidal. But wait, he's also a coward. He can't kill himself, so he finds a way to get himself killed, kind of like suicide by cop. The end.

Times like these, in which homeland security can authorize the surveillance of the most private telephone conversations, it might be easy to be framed for something you didn't do. That's what I'm brainstorming, because I don't think people would want to watch a movie in which the bad guy gets himself killed. This tragic ending has to involve the most innocent person. First, I thought, this guy is almost bipolar with his mood swings. One moment he can be watching TV, the next moment he's tearing down the house. I need to find a way for this character to find a hobby that keeps his temper in check, yet isn't comletely legal.

Tags: poem, writing
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