(click for illustration)
My lunch wasn't planned very well. I decided to wander down movie alley in Glendale, to see if Youth without youth might be playing. I doubt I would've paid to get in if it was playing at any of the the Mann theatres. Sneaking into a theatre showing a worthy film sounded adventuresome, but I couldn't shake the more exciting posibility of sex in a public building.
Since nothing interested me, I walked it off searching and searching for somebody I couldn't find. Oh well. It's not like I don't know I'm psycho. I won't make an effort to be sociable when I see somebody interesting. Either they instigate conversation, or I end up like I did today. It's like being deaf mute because the only form of communication I make is that of placing my order for a classic Italian five inch sub. Even that was challenging because I'm so soft spoken.
I look at the overhead menu trying to find where their sandwiches are listed, but I just can't make any sense of it.BIER Can I have a combo?
CHEF A what?
BIER A six inch sandwich.
CHEF We don't have that. We only have five inches, ten inches… blah blah blah.
BIER Okay. Give me a five inch
CHEF Okay. What kind do you want.
At this time I find the list of sandwichesBIER What do you got?
CHEF We have chicken, turkey, ham… blah blah blah.
I get a look from the chef that says 'you don't have to shout'. After he places my sandwich into the oven, I thank him loud enough so he'd hear, but of course, it sounds sarcastic.BIER Give me a classic Italian. On wheat.
CHEF A what?
BIER A classic Italian!
like the guy lingering in the back of the library on his laptop, wearing headphones in the library, so that he doesn't hear the "closing" announcement. When I go to tell him that we're closed, I shouldn't have added whether he was planning to sleep there because he retorts "You're being a smart ass."
Glendale has a cafe called "Bad ass cafe" so I guess the word ass is socially acceptable now. We can all probably thank former prez Bill Clinton for that when he answered a question with a question during his impeachment trial.
BILL It depends on what the definition of "ass" is.
Now that I think about it, though. I think it was the "S" word he was asking about.
