Bier de Stone ( wrote,
Bier de Stone

It must be fun being a paralegal

I guess I found this in somebody's myspace blog. It actually caught my eye as I recalled a silly law I heard mentioned on TV/radio. Of course, it was left out. Now I'm not so certain it is illegal in L.A. to hang one's underwear on a clothes line.

  1. A city ordinance states that a $500 fine will be given to anyone who detonates a nuclear device within city limits.
  2. Alhambra: You cannot leave your car on the street overnight without the proper permit.
  3. Animals are banned from mating publicly within 1,500 feet of a tavern, school, or place of worship.
  4. A regulation in San Francisco makes it unlawful to use used underwear to wipe off cars in a car wash.
  5. Baldwin Park: Nobody is allowed to ride a bicycle in a swimming pool.
  6. Bathhouses are against the law.
  7. Blythe: You are not permitted to wear cowboy boots unless you already own at least two cows.
  8. Burlingame: It is illegal to spit, except on baseball diamonds; Carmel Ice cream may not be eaten while standing on the sidewalk. (Repealed when Clint Eastwood was mayor); Women may not wear high heels while in the city limits.
  9. Giving or receiving oral sex is prohibited.
  10. Hollywood: It is illegal to drive more than two thousand sheep down Hollywood Boulevard at one time.
  11. In Los Angeles courts it is illegal to cry on the witness stand.
  12. In California it is illegal to have caller ID
  13. In California it's against regulations to let phones ring more than nine times in state offices.
  14. In Los Angeles a man is legally entitled to beat his wife with a leather belt or strap, but the belt can't be wider than 2 inches, unless he has his wife's consent to beat her with a wider strap. Consent should be given prior to the event, as is carefully stipulated.
  15. In Los Angeles, you cannot bathe two babies in the same tub at the same time.
  16. In Riverside, California, kissing on the lips, unless both parties wipe their lips with carbonized rose water, is against the local health ordinance. (Someone needed to be kissed!)
  17. In San Francisco it's illegal to play poker in public or gamble in a barricaded room.
  18. In Ventura County, California, cats and dogs are not allowed to have sex without a permit.
  19. It is a misdemeanor to shoot at any kind of game from a moving vehicle, unless the target is a whale.
  20. It is illegal for a secretary to be alone in a room with her boss.
  21. It is illegal to eat an orange in your bath tub
  22. It is illegal to pile horse manure more than six feet high on a street corner.
  23. Lodi: It is illegal to own or sell "Silly String".
  24. Lompoc: It is illegal to posses, own or raise roosters. This is considered disturbing the peace.
  25. Long Beach: Cars are the only item allowed in a garage; It is illegal to curse on a mini-golf course.
  26. Molesting butterflies can result in a $500 fine.
  27. No alcohol beverages can be displayed within five feet of a cash register of any store in California that sells both alcohol and motor fuel.
  28. No vehicle without a driver may exceed 60 miles per hour.
  29. Prunedale: Two bathtubs may not be installed in the same house.
  30. Riverside: One may not carry a lunch down the street between 11 and 1 o'clock.
  31. San Diego: It is illegal to shoot jackrabbits from the back of a streetcar; The owners of houses with Christmas lights on them past February second may be fined up to $250.
  32. San Francisco bans any "mechanical device that reproduces obscene language."
  33. San Jose: It is illegal to have more than two cats or dogs. -Ord. 7.08.595
  34. Santa Monica: You may not play percussion instruments on the beach.
  35. Sunshine is guaranteed to the masses.
  36. The city of San Francisco holds a copyright on the name "San Francisco." It is illegal to manufacture any item with the name without first getting permission from the city. Since the Supreme Court upheld the copyright, San Francisco has had an annual $300 million surplus every year.
Tags: crazy world

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